“The quotidian stentorian atribilous ululation is abyssopelagic, ” Obahiagbon speaks on Dana Air crash

He is a man of “grammartical swagger”. When it comes to speaking English language, he is in a class of his own. He even attests to his ingenuity: “I need to brand my own book of grammatical verbalism, I am starting to feel as though the dictionary is below me.” Here is Nigeria’s Cicero, a man of “gargantum”oratory.

He gave himself a modest introduction on Facebook: “I am a Law Graduate of University of Benin. I am known as the Verbal contortionist. ” However, Honourable Patrick Obahiagbon enjoys a cult following.

On the recent Dana Air Crash that claims over 153 lives in Ishaga area of Lagos, the Edo-born politician said: “We must halt this ludicrously lugubrious kakistocracy. We must demur against demuren (no onomatopoeic extrapolation intended). The quotidian stentorian atribilous ululation is abyssopelagic. The country is on a precipice of pocalyptic crepscule”.

Who is Obahiagbon? He was once asked. Hear him:  “I want to give you homo sapiens a infinitesimal sample of how the ingredients compose to form me. Anyone care to know? Most yes and a few imbeciles who lack compassion and common sense to get inspired. Since it’s most yes, I’ll navigate you through my journey. I grew up in Benin, but was born and had my elementary education in Sapele. When my father went for further studies in England, we had to relocate to Benin and that got me into Edo College and St. John Bosco Government School, Ubiaja. I proceeded to read law at the University of Benin. After my youth service, I contested an election to represent my ward as a councilor in Oredo Local Government Area in 1990. After, I went to England in search of greener pastures, but I could not take it for more than 18 months. This was because I had a passion for the political developments going on in Nigeria. I died silently in London, but returned to Nigeria , where I joined again in the political development. Six months after my arrival, there was a local government election and I contested for the chairmanship position Long story short, after a few losses. I won an election to the Edo State House of Assembly, where I spent eight years on the platform of my people and it was time to move to a latitudinarian pedestal to discharge service to Nigerians and I presented myself before my party in a hotly, fiercely, but democratically contested primary and it pleased the cosmic masters and my constituents to give me the mandate to fly the party flag and I won. That began my journey to the House of Representatives.”

On Boko Haram, he said: “This is legislative rascality and parliamentary gambadoism at its crudest, basest form. How can the nation be burning, and we are here, simply debating our perks and allowances? It is mind boggling, benumbing, stupefying and paralysing.”